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Monday, 28 January 2019

My LIT EIGTEENTH BIRTHDAY PARTY + THE PANIC OF GROWING OLDER

January 28, 2019 8 Comments

             Finally I am 18! You guys I am so ecstatic, you have no idea how long I have waited for this age. I thank God for keeping me.  I couldn’t wait to turn 18 but look at me now feeling so old , A part of me wishes I was turning 16 again and the other part is so pumped that I am 18. I got a lot of messages, calls etc. Like my friends are the sweetest, they were actually counting down to 12am to call me and guess what I only took one call at that time because your girl slept off  praying.

 I can’t remember what I even prayed for but I know I have been thinking and revaluating, I have asked myself some hard questions like what is my purpose , what defines me , what drives me ,who are my friends , how is my love life and by love life I am talking about Agape love; my approach and response towards people How do I respond to people?  who do people say that I am( see me sounding like Master Jesus).
The phase of adulthood just began for me and I just realized that I am getting closer to being responsible for myself. People of God I can actually go to kirikiri (jail) now  so no messing up lol.

My Phone decided to start acting up and I missed a lot of calls and messages, It pained my entire being eh, I hope everybody understands while I await my Iphone x  yunno!
I shaa recieved gifts,Hugs and lots of kisses
I honestly feel some type of way ever since my birthday party on the (25th January). I think it is the panic of growing older; I literally got a pen and paper to plan my life. Epic! Am I over thinking things? Tell me how you felt when you turned eighteen or grew older.

This panic didn’t start now because my favourite poem in secondary school was ‘’THE PANIC OF GROWING OLDER’’click here to read the poem,It is so beautiful, relatetable and so  freaking accurate, it's by Lenrie peters and I memorised it word for word  now, It is all up in my feelings. Oh well! My year just started and I am going to utilise it. From today I will be more intentional, consistent and happy A.K.A living my best life.

My  Eighteenth birthday was lit by the way, I had people I love come together and we had mad fun. I felt loved like everything was about me. You know I really wish to have a million followers someday with a lot of engagement on my Instagram pageand blog but I realized I wasn’t ready at all. I had roughly 200 messages on my birthday and I couldn’t reply everybody guys It’s a lot of work. I was utterly confused so on this note I forgive the love of my life Abimbola Craig for not replying any of my Dm’s. I understand now GOODNESS!!!  And I hope to learn too

Anyway, my birthday was basically a hang out situation, we played, we got to talk about Adulting , sex,rape, dressing etc. and it was on that day I realised I have not had my first kiss(not going to happen anytime soon) neither have I ever watched high school musical(don’t ask me what I did with my childhood) or Game of thrones (don’t bite me I will watch for watching sake shaa hopefully sometime this year) am I the only one who has not watched it? Because everyone seems to think I am an alien for not watching it, Safe to say my birthday was both educating and entertaining. I will be sharing all we talked about in subsequent posts guys I learnt a lot from different perspectives. Ok this is long enough let me show you  the visuals

we went to the Amusement park 

cake eating time


birthday party and cruise

we had the funest slide ever

fun slide in the park


we ate and drank to stupor


drank to stupor


my friends are the goofiest and I love It


crazy pictures from my eighteenth birthday


Cake eating time


cake eating time


yas! am 18..gee dem




and my mummy came!


mother and her girls
she is the hot one on brown trousers


I had a food baby from the party


bloating



If you stayed till the end , I love you and please take time to appreciate yourself and be with people who love you, even if it is just a handful of them
gbe body eh! peace out
















Thursday, 17 January 2019

WHY YOU SHOULD NOT RAPE HER

January 17, 2019 0 Comments
Rape should stop

MY OPINION ON RAPE AND RAPE VICTIMS


   I deliberately chose not to do any further research or read any article on rape before putting up this post because I want to speak only  my mind, I am not a rape victim but I was very close to being one , on more than two strong occasions. you should continue reading if you want details.
I have also made it a point of duty to spare you the dictionary meaning of rape, I will give you my own meaning of rape , I will tell you what I have called it. 'Rape is a wicked/malicious act of stealing integrity, Identity, pride etc it is the forceful engagement and ownership of a body that is not your's'. OK I promised myself to make this simple,

  So Rape is basically having sexual intercourse with someone without full consent yes full consent. I say this because common sense should tell anyone that mixed signals or reluctance is a red flag , common if she is saying yes and no at the same time bro zip up and bounce. I am particularly basing on the female folk because truth be told they are the main victims of this evil called rape now I had a conversation with a friend and he said ''men are raped too don't make noise as if its only women that suffer it.''
 
I wanted to be upset because its annoying how its only when we talk about rights for women that some men remember they have been mistreated, They don't talk o until a reasonable person starts a movement against injustice done to women, but i decided to let it go and think of the small percentage of my earthly brothers who have been rape victims. No jokes o  I hear that this rape thing can be common among homosexuals you know , when the small boy say he is not doing again with the big man and he forces him to do. Tufiakwa! The world has spoilt shaa. All I am saying is if they don' give you why the heck should you take it.

  Rape is bad and there is no justification for it see eh even if I choose to walk around naked it is never any goddam bodies business, I mean! nobody should suffer for anybody's lack of self control period you might not agree with me suit yourself though.

I hear some people give sickening illustrations  like if a bank leaves the save open and someone comes to steal their money whose fault is it, let me answer it for them , first of , the the person is a thief ole! and should be punihed c'est fini oh jare, it is not your own in the first place so why take it without permission. Secondly, when are we going to stop comparing women to buildings and inanimate objects for crying out loud the woman/girl is not CBN or Access bank lets have sense please, and before you give the yeye example of Rape is already a problem why put more fire to it by dressing indecently or going to odd places, excuse you!

  we are meant to be concerned about how to stop the rape and rapists not how to stop ourselves from getting raped by the rapists stay woke! I abhor indecent dressing but common we are too intelligent to justify rape by that now , far be it from me and you.its too long aby,stay with me dont go!
rape victims


Rape victims


1. Never blame a rape victim no matter the circumstance surrounding the rape
you have no idea the psychological trauma we go through oops sorry they go through remember I said I had a near experience let me gist you small. Basically I followed this guy to his house,Uncle did not invite me neither did he beg me to come , I just went and he tricked me into believing we were going to hang out immediately as per he was in a hurry to leave his room that let him just get his things ,get fire! brethren I was busy watching MTV shuga on his sleek plasma TV uncle Timini and aunty Jemima them were doing their thing see me watching with keen interest . I was standing up and clutching my bag to my chest btw. so my interest was so keen that I did not realise he had changed to comfortable clothes and he was now on his bed.

 My brothers and sisters I saw him on the bed hissed in my mind and went straight to the door only to realise it was padlocked ,People of God that padlock was huge and the guy was huge and the room was small so there was no space or way I could do inter house sports with him in that room, where will I run too. long story short I sat down humbly on the rug and I played along and by play along I mean I allowed him hold my hands and waist etc then I promised to come back in the evening and sleep over. see eh fashi all my girl power if i did anyhow it would have been a case of rape and domestic violence. My God was awake so the mumu believed me and let me go , He was really forcing himself on me like this guy was ready everything was upright.
God gave me wisdom to handle it , now if he suceeded I would get stupid questions like why did you go there , who sent you , did you send mixed signals,why where you not at home etc you get my point.It is just sad , i'll tell you the second attempt one day just stay tuned to this blog okay.

married women are rape victims too

THERE ARE MARRIED RAPE VICTIMS TOO


 Even If you are married or you are dating or both of you have been having sexual intercourse for many years Rape is Rape. The day you say I don't want and your partner forces you, listen to me you have just been raped period. The amount of time you've had sex before is inconsequential don't let anybody convince you otherwise.

HER OUTFIT IS NOT A CLARION CALL TO VICTIMISE HER

Lastly, I want us to be more reasonable and aware when it comes to rape. Lets be more accommodating and empathetic towards this issue and stop making excuses for rapists. Some people think it's fair when a woman is raped if she dresses indecently or is seen at odd places , see eh the length of her skirt should never increase the size of your manhood haba fear God na, Her exposed cleavage is not a clarion call on your self control , lets be sensible please and I do agree that men go through rape too , even by women I can only hope and pray for a better society but truth be told it is more rampant on the part of women.

  The cause of rape is not darkness or alcohol or indecent dressing or whatever , the sole and only cause of rape are the RAPISTS. It is what it is and please stop saying what if she was your sister or daughter or mother It makes it look like she must be related to you in order not to be raped or given Justice, she doesn't need to be your sister all she need to be is a human being. I will probably talk more about this some other time and I know I said or a gazillion times but I hope you get my point  and I want to hear your thoughts too please leave me a comment I'll love to read. Cheers!





Wednesday, 9 January 2019

MY FUTURE HUSBAND IS OVER THE COUNTER

January 09, 2019 2 Comments
classic powder and brow pencil

       

STORY TIME

HOW I MET MY WOULD HAVE BEEN FUTURE HUSBAND

Good evening or morning or anytime you get to read this. I just said let me gist you. 
I need to know if this is a sign or if it's just  something we experience all the time. So have you noticed how fresh over-the counter guys are? Please tell me you have o, It is legit like they hand pick the finest people to be receptionists or sales representatives, you would sternly disagree with me If you only buy from Abacha or Ekeawka, as for me I have never been to those places, but I hear it's a commercial market with lots of people haggling you know buying and selling stuff (some people will still say they saw me there yesterday).It's well o the truth will prevail one day. For us that shop in super marts and grocery stores maybe you can relate, 

I have graciously come to the conclusion that handsome men are designed for the counter(don't bite me) because I am a regular customer at the bank I go there to deposit or withdraw money that doesn't belong to me and every time I go there something sweet must happen and am thinking it's no longer a coincidence maybe the universe is trying to communicate something to me. AMEN! lemme gist you.
On a very hot Friday afternoon I went to the bank with my mum she had stuffs to do , I was literally just her handbag following her from pillar to post then I noticed one chocolate flavoured looking guy starring dreamily at me needless to say I wasn't in my pepper them gang attire, I basically wore a washed out purple off-shoulder blouse  and a Jean trouser that was begging for redemption, see eh that day I couldn't have been bothered abeg.

I know your waiting for me to land relax! grab a glass Its getting juicy.  This guy kept on looking at me and quite frankly, I was enjoying the attention so I starred back occasionally I mean! It is not everyday you see a cute beard gang that dosen't look like a goat. Before I knew what was happening we exchanged Numbers, just like that. He didn't call or text for days until I went to the bank again , nobody sent me o but I know I did not go there to look for him. 20 Minutes later am enjoying bank Ac and pressing Phone then this cleaner walks up to me and  gives me a note It read ''lets meet outside'' oshee! this one is smart 

 Your girl stepped outside and this yummy man walked up to her. I was way taller than him to my bewilderment ,I didn't mind , do you know what can happen if my genes meet his genes oh my ovaries jumped for joy! that man is fine joor. So just as if he was the confirmation I needed to believe my friend when she said ''fine boys have issues.'' He asked when I will be available to come over to his house.I was taken aback, I was shook! so am like what do you mean and he says '' I am busy inside when are you coming to show me love.'' 

In that moment I swear his fine face disappeared from my eyes I saw him clearly now and he was so close to the ground. How do you lack sense and height at the same time Mtcheww.  I politely walked out on him and later that night he sent me messages of how he loves big girls and dislikes them if they turn out to be 'mummies girls' like me. He said he also has good friends that will spend money on me wow! I have become a universal donor, I didn't reply any of his messages until he said 'give me your account number.' well I replied, I told him to go away, that tufiakwa! lol, I promise I refused to  send it or maybe I did my memory fails me at this point lol. He views my whatsapp story and he has wished me happy new year but my mother said 'when you see a man like that run till your legs can reach the back of your ears.'

As if that was not enough yesterday I went to a different Bank, Trust me I never wanted to go They are always sending me haba! It was a long queue and I could tell this guy was looking straight into my eyes. I didn't even smile pim. It got to my turn and he says ''Sweetheart your welcome.'' welcome to where I didn't say nothing. He unwrapped 50k and told me to write my beautiful name and number on the wrap, smooth thang He was communicating with his eyes and he kept batting his eyelid and smiling at me then he said ''I will keep eyeing you till you do the needful.'' He made me laugh so yea I wrote my name and number for him. I was even doing team natural that day o nothing too much, oh ok I put small classic powder and maybe small eyeliner I mean my brows where not even noticeable ,even my lips was not too pink so I don't know what is always drawing bank people to me as I am not figure 8 or size 2..He has not called me back and me  I think I will spend this my two hundred naira if I don't go back to that bank and deposit it. 

What do you think? Because If I stay here my future Husband might become a thing of the past
PS; That picture was my natural look to the bank.  I did the make up myself yay



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I am a writer, law student , flawed and adorable girl on a quest to find herself. , click here →

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