Friday, 28 February 2020

HAIR GOALS + WHY I CUT MY HAIR

Low cut


I have had the big chop three times in total for different reasons.

The first time; I was in primary four and I had long straight hair. I had just written the common entrance examination to get into secondary school and I was so excited. I passed the exam and I was to go to a boarding school where everybody shaved their hair.

I was so elated that I couldn't wait to go to school and tell my classmates that I was leaving them. The Joy of having to skip primary 5( a whole year) was overwhelming. I didn’t even wait for the actual school preparations to begin before I decided to cut my hair.

My mum agreed because according to her since I was born I had never cut my hair.
I was now a baldie ready to go to high school. But guess what people. When It was time to go for the interview and return to school. My parents said I was too young, that they just wanted to test my intelligence.

 Ladies and gentlemen, I didn’t know how to react to the fact that I cut my hair for no reason. I took my low cut to school and I had to handle the numerous questions and occasional stares from classmates and teachers in my school.

Low cut

The second time: In all honesty, I just woke up and cut the hair. I have good hair genes and my hair was perfectly fine. I just sort Of felt It wasn’t long enough and It was relaxed( not that relaxing your hair is bad). I just saw some people on their natural hair and I loved it. I didn’t know that my hair could be that beautiful growing out on its own. I wanted to try it.

The third time: it is safe to say here that I was nearly flogged for cutting my hair. My natural hair was 2 years old.

Natural hair
I can't believe I shaved off this bulb of joy
Afro


It was soft, afro, long, talk about hair goals. There was not a day I wore the fro out that someone did not comment on it. I didn’t use any product asides shea butter, but it was hard for people to believe. Some months before I cut it. I went to loosen my faux locs and the hairstylist cut my hair so much so that It became unequal. I cried. I am not good at showing  Emotions but man! E pain me.  

But because I serve a living God it literally took about 2-3 months for it to grow back and sort of equalize.
My Hair was amazing again and I didn't use any product.
I couldn’t even believe the growth but I still went ahead and cut it. That morning I washed my hair measured the length, then I  went to the barber's shop with my brother to cut it.

Months before that I had been talking frequently about shaving my hair and my people thought it was mere banter. The barber asked me If I was cutting all that hair because I didn’t have money to make it(lol). Another said I’d be ugly If I cut it(  but guess who is a baby girl and slaying the cut)

Beautiful

Some girls at the shop were ready to take the strands of my hair and attach it to their own If they could.
 It just made me realize how much value people attach to hair.
My friends found out I cut my hair, see some of their hilarious responses.
 I'd share the ones I can find.

WhatsApp chat
WhatsApp chat
WhatsApp chat
Now on a serious note, how much does your hair mean to you? do you think it defines you? Do you think your hair Is the reason for your beauty?
Do you think hair Is just hair?
I never gave deep thought to hair, growing or cutting It has always been an Impulsive decision for me. It depends on my feeling or mood,  no due deliberation needed at all. I just do it.
 I honestly believe that I am beautiful regardless and my beauty doesn’t lie under hair or suffice when I have hair.
My opinion about hair is varied though.

Hair

First, I believe hair is just hair so you can decide to cut it or leave it. It does not make you less of a girl or boy. I also understand that hair can be very deep for some people. Hair symbolizes so much to many. It can be a way to express our creativity and culture

E.g.  I have heard that some women have been called unkempt for not having straight hair, their natural hair was described as nappy and unsuitable for the workplace. So women were forced to put chemicals on their hair just to meet up to a certain standard.  

In some cultures, a woman must always have hair and when she cuts it, it is a sign of despair, mourning or a sign that she has been ostracised.  So when I say hair is just hair, what I really mean is that you are so fearfully, wonderfully and beautifully made for something as replaceable as hair to define you.

It's just hair and it can grow back. Whether you texturize, relax or leave your hair in its natural form, It’s okay. Just make sure you are doing it for the right motive.

Don’t relax your hair because of societal pressure or influence from the western world. Don’t be team natural because it’s becoming a trend and hashtag. Do your hair how you want to do your hair because you like it and you feel good with it. I personally love my hair natural and may never relax it because I think I look cuter in my afro.
Hair

I know people who might never carry natural hair because to them it’s difficult to maintain. Let’s be honest natural hair sometimes is not the easiest to maintain especially If you have strong hair. So just do you!

Here is a fact about hair that blew my mind!  
Did you know that some hairstyles we're essential for the survival of black people? Our ancestors placed rice seeds and gold between two sections of hair. They did that so that if they are captured and forced across the voyage on the Atlantic they will at least have a small amount of food. 
 Please tell me in the comments. how much does hair mean to you? Would you ever consider cutting your hair? How do you like your hair natural or permed? You can tell me any other thing you know about hair and what symbolizes.  I will love to read from you. 

Monday, 17 February 2020

WHO TOLD US THESE THINGS

Image via @unsplash
I write a lot of poetry because poetry is my first love when it comes to writing. I just realized I don't post it here as much.
Disclaimer: My imagination runs wild , sometimes it is calm and collected other times it attempts the impossible and most times, it's just simple and searching.

My inspiration comes at odd times too because I type this in the middle  of a Criminal law class. I am risking my phone being seized so  please Give  me feedback after reading.

 WHO TOLD US THESE THINGS 

i)
That the heart can be broken
This same heart that pumps blood
Through a pipeline of veins
What is capable of leaving this
Powerhouse broken?

ii)
That a man can be snatched by a woman
This Four limbed breathing mammal
 The supposed stronger vessel
How can he be collected like a common purse?

iii)
That we are really humans
We with skin the colour of Earth and sand
We with bones as hard as rocks
We With with hair like leaves and grasses
We with limbs like the roots of an Iroko
We with blood flowing like water!
Who do we think we are?

iii)
That we have a limit to what we can do
How can this be?
When our creator was uncreated
With the audacity to walk on water
And the guts to look death  in the eye
And call it's bluff!
What can even dare to stop us?

Iv)
That we can not exist in multiple places
 Is this true?
When our imagination take trips to the
 Past, present and future at will
 When our memories  can travel to depths
And time flies to ensure we don't dwell too deep
 Who then says we are not omnipotent?

What do you think of this poem? Drop a line or two regarding anything you find absurd or ridiculous. This should be fun.

Friday, 7 February 2020

I DON'T LIKE EVE

I enjoy reading stories of great women in the bible because it inspires me a lot and it makes me realize that Jesus Himself wants every woman to succeed.
Beautiful girl


 I love the leadership of Deborah, the courage and determination in Esther, the discerning spirit of Abigail, the prayer power of Hannah, the openness of Martha to receive counsel, the virtue of Mary among others but you see Eve I don’t like her.
"She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it" (Genesis 3:6).
I spent time trying to understand why somebody chose an Apple over God's instruction like it wasn’t even chocolate or Ice cream or pineapple. It was Apple! Apple that is not even that sweet.
Did she not find it suspicious that a serpent came to talk to her about a tree?

Her disobedience is believed to have been the cause of the pain women have to go through today. The labor pains, the cramps, the desire for men, etc.
Brown skin girl


I have always imagined interviewing Eve, I would ask her questions like
Did the Apple then taste like cold Ice cream? or were the other fruits in the garden of Eden sour?
 What do you think? Because I thought Eve should have known better than to eat the fruit.

But
It’s funny how much we blame Eve, (yes me and you) that we easily forget that women like Jezebel and Delilah existed. Jezebel that convinced her husband to kill an innocent man, she promoted sexual immorality and purported to kill the prophets of God. Or is it Delilah that Samson loved yet she betrayed him for money.

There were other women who messed up in the bible but all of us want to chew Eve that ate an apple. I mean I get why it’s like that but let me open your eyes a little.


Many of us are like Eve, heck we don’t even have the right to Judge her. Now ask yourself how many times you knew the right thing to do yet you did otherwise. There are times when we knew better but didn’t do better. At this point let she who is without sin be the first to exit this blog post.

We can blame Eve all we want but let us not forget she was the first woman on earth, first to be a wife, first to be a mother and a woman with all the responsibilities that came with it. How many times have you started something for the first time and suddenly became a master at it?

Eve was a woman with many firsts and she handled a lot.  From leaving paradise to knowing one of her sons killed the other. Imagine her pain. We should be showing empathy. Not to justify her sin but think about it.
She don chop am be say she don chop am. she cannot vomit the apple!
Some people have argued that she had God and Adam to guide her so there was no excuse. That's true but some of us have God, our pastors, our parents; friends, etc and we still mess up.
 Most of us are easily influenced just like Eve so Instead of blaming Eve we must learn from her mistakes and understand.

Fun fact Eve was very influential all she had to do was give the fruit to Adam, biblically Adam was the one who heard from God about this fruit issue so he basically chose his wives voice over God's voice. ( we will talk about the fight of voices in another blog post).
Abram followed Sarai’s advice instead of trusting God’s timing.  Jacob deceived his own father because of the words of his mother, Rebekah.
King Ahasuerus listened to Esther and the Jews were spared.  Deborah accompanied Barak and a battle was won.
The bottom line is women are the most influential creatures on earth quote me anywhere.

I didn’t like Eve because I could not see past her sin and that's just Toxic. God forgave Eve and I am sure He loved her. It was just important for her to take responsibility for her actions. Eve's experience is enough tutelage for women all over the world.
As a matter of fact, I think Eve was a phenomenal woman. Do you agree?

I see Eve in myself sometimes, and you don’t need to look too much to see her in yourself too. It's the little things like when we see something nice and we lose our home training just to get it. Or the times when we choose our desires over God's voice. It’s a lot to handle.

All I am here to say is don’t be like Eve. But at the same time don’t be a hater. Lol, it is very easy to criticize something you didn’t participate in. Just be more constructive with your criticism.

We bash Eve for wanting to be “more like God” when she ate the fruit. I thought God's plan is for us to be like Him!
 Then I realized something that Eve’s sin was not wanting to be like God but wanting to do so  Without first trying to seek God and have a relationship with Him. He would have given her wisdom and more had she followed  simple instruction.

I know this post is all over the place but it’s just how it is in my head.

IPhone 11
This is sonia not Eve and she is a darling, you can follow her on Instagram @itsoni_ee

Here are a few lessons to learn from Eve

  • Be thankful and Focus on the things you have: you know how Eve left the many trees just to chase that one tree that caused the fall of man, that’s exactly how some of us focus on the things we don’t have that others do e.g. the dream house, the perfect body, etc and this breeds jealousy.
  • Don’t doubt the voice of God if he says don’t do it then don’t do it. As a woman you wield so much power and influence, please don’t use it like Eve.
  • You are not in control: The fundamental problem for Eve was that she wanted to determine what was right and what was wrong, instead of obeying her Creator.
To be continued.



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