3 Things you should never say to anyone after the lockdown


This is a guide to help you not to attract curses for yourself. We are all looking forward to the end of this pandemic so that we can return to our normal lives without fear. It's been roughly three months and a lot of people have not seen each other since the lockdown. 
It is normal to anticipate and have expectations about each other but let us be civilised. It is important that we consider people's feelings. Remember it's a pandemic we went in for, not a life master class, a vacation or summer body camp.

We are human and our feelings are valid, it doesn't make sense for anybody to make another person feel bad about anything this period. There is power in the tongue o!  I know some of us Africans are savage by default. Some of us don't even know that these things are wrong. So I am here to help you. In case you don't know what I am talking about. I have created a 3 step guide for you.


Here are three things you should not say to anyone when you see them after the Lockdown


Pandemic and lockdown diaries

1. You have added/lost weight / or any other comment about peoples bodies.


If you just say you are looking good or fresh, you won't die I promise. The gods won't send you to the evil forest if you just avoid making comments about people's weight.

Trust me everybody has a mirror and when it comes to weight loss or weight gain people's goals differ, it is an emotional journey for some people. Imagine body shamming a woman with PCOS( polycystic ovarian syndrome) one of the symptoms/ effects of it is excessive weight gain. You don't know the struggle such a person has had to go through.
So just zip it before you demoralize somebody.

Coronavirus has messed up our mental health, do not turn your mouth into an assistant virus. Shalom! 


2. Did you even achieve anything this Lockdown


Coronavirus pandemic

Kpele o Albert einstein. See eh, its a pandemic not a productivity contest. Everybody is dealing with things differently. While I agree that this is a good time to discover yourself, read books and make money online if you have the means and resources, I also think that we should not judge people or put undue pressure on them for not striving to become the next big thing. Let's give ourselves grace. 

It is natural to crave self-gratification and accolades. It is okay to want a pat on the back sometimes, just don't do it out of spite or comparison.
Life is not a thug of war. There is space for all of us. Ask others how they are, how they are feeling, how they got through the Corona period. Heck, some people could not even feed.

We know you went over and beyond, more power to you, just don't make anybody feel less by trying to downplay or weigh your effort with theirs. This too shall pass, let's just be civilised. 


3. Me too / my own was even worse.


Lockdown diaries

Well done o! Mr Experience. I understand that you want to empathise and you want to relate to everything after all this pandemic hit all of us. But note that it hit us differently. when someone is relating their woes to you resist the urge to make it about you.

Listen first and show concern before you tell them how your own house was on fire. It's hard, but it is doable. If you seriously wanted to talk about it, then you should have opened up first. This thing is not a competition, there is no prize for the most miserable Lockdown experience. Just be present and offer assistance anyway you can.


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Lock down diaries


Thank you, stay safe and resist the urge to shalaye! Please if you have any more suggestions or opinions, let's party in the comments.

6 comments

  1. Rose, you did well. In short, you are doing well. Let's bridle our tongue and be careful of what slips out of that slippery tongue. Ewedu stick will not fall and kill us ooo

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  2. Hmm. I'm just sharing this to everyone I know so they can be properly guided because I too can pick the worst thing about you and comment on it since we all want to be mad. Most people don't even know they're doing number three. It's now the default Nigerian anthem before Arise o compatriots. Great work riri.

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    Replies
    1. This one said "since we all want to be mad" hahahahhahahah. And oh my lord yes, the number 3 one is what most nigerians do soo much. They see it as some type of way to make you feel better about yours.

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  3. So all of them are great no doubt but the one that caught my eye was the first one just because the thing you spoke about there is a information i recently discovered. I'm talking about polycystic ovarian syndrome.
    This is a great example to point out how draining and damaging comments about anyones body can really affect them. I agree with you mehn, just say your're looking good/fresh and keep it moving.

    The third one "my own was worse" pisses me off soo much. This is just saying that i can carry my emotions,feelings and everything i have been through and just shove it down somewhere and lock all because "your own was worse". I believe people that are mad just think this is a way to cheer someone up but obviously that's not true.
    The more i think about it the more it pisses me off mehn.
    You are not helping me out in processing and talking about my own situation, you are not empathetic at all yet you carry "my own was worse" and plaster it as a way to say "you shouldn't even have any emotions to what you've been through, its a small thing"
    If you've seen any picture of a broken heart with duct tape on it that's literally an interpretation of " my own was worse".
    Anyways this is another great piece, great work.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you. I know a lot of people who argue that "my own is worse" is a way to show the person that they are not alone and others face the same thing. Like some worth of solace.. Lol..i want to get it, but..

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  4. Wow!this is really good guild

    You have pointed out here Mgbod,. Many has taken this pandamic period as a competitive contest,and some try to rob it on others face by telling you that why are you not doing something or making you feel as if your own matter worst or you're just a time waster,forgetting that this life is a stage and everyone has different time zone. People should learn how to talk in other not to emotionally demoralise a person cos there are so many persons that put into consideration what people say about them and thereby making them think they're not good.
    Number3,has become a normal in this contemporary environment we leave in. Your intention to bring up your own story as it concerns what someone came to you for aid might be genuine, but you got to listen to the person first and try to be on his shoe and not making it feel like its not a big deal.

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